Selfie Queen (Sing Along!)

I’m going to preface this with two things.

  1. I’ve noticed an uptick, in the last couple of months, in the number of selfies I see on social media.  Primarily among people I follow, but do not actually know.  That is, many of the selfies in question belong to people who might have an online job, and therefore get traffic (and therefore money) from their social media presence.  Also, it could be that the number of selfies hasn’t actually increased, but that my attention to selfies has.
  2. Probably everyone I know on social media is guilty of excessive selfieness (I’m making up a word), at least from time to time.  I know I’ll go through selfie-spells here and there.    (Plus, it’s possible that I take fewer selfies than some people because of my inability to take selfies that are remotely flattering.  I’m blaming my short arms, though it’s probably just my face.)

One day I was noticing a particularly selfie-ful (while I’m making up words) individual online and thought (not necessarily judgmentally), “She is the selfie QUEEN.”  For the remainder of the day, I had “selfie queen” repeating in my head because my brain applied it to the tune of the ABBA song, “Dancing Queen.”  Since then, every time I see a selfie (e.g., many times a day), my brain turns on the tune again.  I got sick of hearing “You are the Selfie Queen, young and sweet, only seventeen – oh yeah.  You can dance, blah, blah, blah, having the time of your life.  Blah, blah, blah,  watch that scene, blah-blah, the Dancing Queen,” repeating in my head.  (Yes, that’s how it sounded, verbatim.)  So I filled in the blanks.  Here you go:

 

You can duck, you can gape, you know that life is a stage
See that post, watch your screen, dig on the Selfie Queen

Friday night and your hair’s on fleek
Out with some friends at the joint that’s chic
Where they have the good lighting, gets you in the mood
Your pics are gonna look so good

Not everybody can be this fly
But your squad just rules and you’re not shy
In your cool location, everything is fine
Pick a filter to enhance
And then you Snap that Chat
(Oops, now it’s just “Snap”)

You are the Selfie Queen, posting tweets, what are you seventeen?  Oh yeah?!
Selfie Queen, steal the show, let everyone online know
You’ve hit the gym, hit the bar, you’re an online superstar!
See that post, watch your screen, dig on the Selfie Queen

You have all the apps like Instagram
Sharing pics, that’s so your jam
Looking into the camera, any one will do
You leave us all in a trance
How many likes? You steal a glance….

You are the Selfie Queen, posting tweets, what are you seventeen?  Oh yeah?!
Selfie Queen, steal the show, let everyone online know
You’ve hit the gym, hit the bar, you’re an online superstar!
See that post, watch your screen, dig on the Selfie Queen

Selfie

Pete the Cat is a stand-in for a real pet. I did manage to get my running stuff in the background, though. (Mainly because this is where I was already sitting, and I’m lazy af.)  #nomakeup #nofilter #noshame

Here’s an extra line I’d come up with and realized I had too many at the beginning of the song.  I hated to waste it:

Strike that stance, nail that pose, snap pics like you’re one of the pros

I am only disappointed that I didn’t manage to work in either some hashtags (e.g., #IWokeUpLikeThis) or the word “hastag” itself.

At least if my brain is going to start a sing-a-long for every selfie, I can skip the “blah, blah, blahs” now.  My mind also feels relieved.  It was as if it was nagging me to figure out exactly what the Selfie Queen would do, lyrically, and couldn’t let it go until we found out.

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